Are you planning your wedding and feeling the weight of it all? We feel you.
At Chris Chang Photography, we’ve served countless engaged couples and shared in their wedding experiences. It’s easy to get all worked up. After all, it’s the single biggest day of our lives.
So here we’ve distilled a healthy list of advice and pointers that will hopefully help you and your partner take the stress off wedding planning.
1. Have your common objective in mind when the going gets tough
Wedding planning can be a full-time job on its own, on top of our day jobs. The reality truly sinks in when contracts are signed and commitments are made.
Be it time pressing financial decisions, or small decorative details - every element can be a source of conflict if you so choose it to be.
In these times, we would do well to ask ourselves and remind our partners what we are truly after:
A picture perfect wedding day or a happy healthy marriage?
Focusing on a strong common goal helps every couple fight together versus fighting against each other.
2. Embracing each other's differences
Variety is the spice of life. When two unique individuals come together, it’s inevitable that both of you may oppose or even clash in opinions. What makes a marriage exciting is often when we are able to appreciate our partner’s differences over being shocked by it.
Developing an acceptance of who each other enables a healthy environment for communication without judgement or disrespect. While this can take considerable time and effort initially, figuring this out in the early stage will set the both of you up for success in the long run.
3. Even with heavy discussions, remember to love each other.
Let’s face it: we’ve seen our fair share of couples parting ways even in the wedding planning stage. Granted, every context is different. But it doesn’t change the fact that loving marriages are defined by just that - loving.
It’s easy to let loose when we are not our best selves. That’s when heavy discussions have the potential to lead to destructive conflict. Some words once spoken will leave scars even if forgiven. This is when it’s often wise to be quick to listen, slow to anger.
Being able to make decisions and problem solve as a couple peaceably is a key foundation of every successful marital relationship.
Need more tips? Check out our 10 Tips to Avoid Becoming Bridezilla (Calming your Wedding Day Nerves)
4. Asking for help where needed
Most couples are getting married for the first time. So unless you or your partner does wedding planning professionally or as a hobby, there is bound to have challenges lurking around every corner.
The good news is we don’t have to do it on our own. Do count on us, your trusty wedding photographer, too! Better yet, check out the rest of our wedding tips and blog.
Having a reliable team of brothers and sisters or simply being open to advice (from the right sources) often will provide us with wise counsel for decision making.
“Is this dress too revealing?”
“Do we really need to serve alcohol?”
Ask, and you shall receive your answer.
5. Pro-tip for the men from the ladies: be involved and be generous with assurance
Let’s face it: regardless of the task, wedding planning definitely isn’t a one-party affair. While it is easy to leave the all the decision making to one party, it is more memorable to build towards a glorious wedding together hand in hand.
Even for decisions that seem like it should automatically be made by the bride, it can still be pressurising. As some of our brides would concur, body language plays a big part in assuring our partners we are involved. Maintaining eye contact in conversation makes a huge difference. On top of that, speaking our minds freely (especially for guys) helps to communicate honesty.
And most importantly, remember to give plenty of assurance that your engaged and want to be involved even if you start to sound like a broken record.
6. Being realistic and prioritise needs
Wedding planning - often the first major test of a couple’s relationship, can be a stressful process.
Even romantic K-dramas are made possible only with a squad of production crew and good processes. Furthermore, when it comes to managing inter-family relationships and expectations, even experienced professional project managers may falter.
This is when it is essential to lay down all the cards when it comes to practical needs. We recommend leaving no ground untouched so you and your partner have a practical assessment of the situation as part of your game plan.
Because no one should start their marriage in debt. Economic conditions and social trends have evolved in our day and age. While a great celebration leaves beautiful memories, healthy savings will help the both of you get to life and family goals with lesser stress, and in turn a happier marriage.
Spending within your means is sound advice. Financial prudence can take precedence over fanfare to please all the relatives and friends. It can also make the difference between a happy DAY and happy DAYS.
8. Keeping a checklist of to-dos
Digitally or in a notebook, a good checklist is going to be a key piece of your wedding planning game plan. Sync it to a calendar.
Or take your pick from this list of trusty wedding planning apps.
Having communicated every touch point with your partner, now affirm each other and act upon it!